You Want To Put What Where?

TMI Tuesday: July 30, 2019

Let’s get right to it, this week’s TMI Tuesday is posted.



1. If you were a sex worker what kind of sex work would you NOT do?

Like all human beings I have been working for sex, at sex, or because of sex since the moment I discovered my special purpose. Ergo I am a sex worker. As a sex worker I will have no doings with human traffickers. Through publishing, films, and living life I may have inadvertently crossed paths with a few; I have never transacted commerce or sex with said criminals or their victims knowingly.

2. You are a sex worker and you must have a specialty. Which ONE of the following would be your specialty and why?
a. Live sex shows

(a) It is always live. Otherwise it would be necrophilia, and unless previous arrangement was made their could be no consent: implied or otherwise. Not to mention the whole concept to me is just plain icky.
b. Professional domination
c. Camming

3. What is your secret fetish?

Massage. Giving and receiving. As vanilla as that sounds you would be surprised where such intimate rubbings lead.

4. Anal sex can be pretty alluring? Tell the truth, which do you prefer anal or vaginal sex?

As a pitcher I say nothing beats the V. Not to mention indiscreet buggery can create many an unanticipated issue. But if you are game I shall be a careful practitioner.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing you have said during sex?

Your sister never ever lets me put that there.

Bonus: Is your g-spot in your ass? If no, where is it?

If in g-spot you are referring to my goofy spot, why it is all in my head silly.


How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!


There Was

Kippie Chiquita and Lenora Block could have been twins, in a negative positive reversal kind of universe. Even though I didn’t meet Lenora for years after I first met Kippie.

One hot summer twilight as I was moping, or as a teen I identified it as hanging around, the park bench where I usually socialized. Alone or sometimes with friends at that age. As now, I did some of my best socializing on my own. It was the time of day when the public park had a shift change from younger children and their mothers, to sub tweens venturing out on their own, into the twilight of the teens.


Alone or in packs.

Across the park, through the playground jungle of slides, swings, and even the insidious teeter totter I spied a hint of yellow in motion. A fluid, hypnotic dancing motion of sorts. A very vibrant hint of yellow that moved through the park in my general direction. Almost like the last rays of sunshine of a day.

What began as a slight visual cue slowly blossomed into full tilt visual stimulus. What started as an object of yellow slowly revealed itself and morphed into a person. Not just any person, but a very lithe young woman. Prancing with pointed toes. Cantering with very light blonde curly permed hair bouncing about with an added spin or two for effect. I could barely make out the other person with her. Her accompaniment walked with that sulky directness that could only be identified as mopey.

Just like me. 

Unlike me, female.

Unlike Kippie, very nondescript and working very hard at staying that way.  

As Kippie danced her way onto my turf details began to take hold. She was wearing a very yellow and bright kind of pant suit halter top combo platter that clung tightly to her shapely legs, around her round behind, and a halter that flounced gingerly over her spare breasts. Clinging just enough to reveal the firm lusciousness which were the Telos of her tits without giving nary a clue to the fullness of those obscured delights. The halter top tied off around her slender neck with a simple hand tied bow that peeped out from under her flouncing blond bob.

Her skin was so white that she almost disappeared under the glare of her yellow jumpsuit giving her overall presence a glow as she flitted about her glum gray friend. This friend always seemed to accompany Kippie in our encounters to come, but she was so forgettable that I am unable to recall her having ever given her name. I can only refer to her as Not Lenora. Nope, indeed Lenora would not appear for quite a few years hence.

Once Kippie and company finished traversing the length of the park it only took moments for her to be chattering away gaily about this and that and the other thing in my ear. Sometimes roaming about my park bench, sometimes sitting either way to near, or way to far on the bench. She spoke of many things. Many things that sent my imagination reeling and put my heart racing. I would focus on her face which shimmered when she spoke. Her expressive eyes of cerulean blue twinkling as the sun set and the night cooled. Her lips had a dash of pink about them as did her cheeks. Either her natural coloring or the lightest touch of make -up were equally suspect. Who knew? Who cared? She spoke and I listened. She laughed and I smiled. She would rise up and again prance on the park path before me and I would follow her movements, not just with my eyes, but with my whole being.

All I recall is being totally enchanted by everything she said or did on that evening, yet unable to reasonably articulate or recount a thing she said because she communicated in a language that was only gilded with words. Her message to me was buried in the sub-carrier vibration that fill the space between all matter and glues all together despite the perceived void.

Her yellow halter hid from me the mysteries I sought. Her tight yellow pants, so shear as to allow her energy to breath in the summer heat while containing all the mystery my young mind could muster.  Her blond hair crowned and poised upon her delicate featured face as she shared unrevealed wisdom of all that I could ever wish to know.

Her familiar lurked.  Still afoot, though I knew not where. Nor cared. Kippie was this night. In the spotlight of the twilight she touched my cheek lightly. Her charge filled me with light, and she flitted on her merry way, all prance and canter and spin about her lumbering gray host as they left the park. My eyes followed, but I did not. I had not been invited to join on this night.

Kippie would own many a night that summer, but only if Kippie wanted to take possession of that time slot. I would find Kippie in the park at the strangest times. She would come out of nowhere. Almost seemed like she lived in the bushes. She claimed she went to the schools I went to, yet no one I knew knew her. She knew the names of many of my friends and teachers , yet none seemed to recall her. She seemed to know every nook and cranny of our neighborhood. It’s Folklore and rampant rumor of all the goings on in the neighborhood that made up my universe at this time were within her purview. I had no interest in the larger world. She shared my indifference of events abroad in the city other than our immediate location. My indifference inflated as my infatuation grew. I lived for our chance meetings in the park. I learned that the presence of Not Lenora was of no concern to me. She seemed to be there when Kippie wanted, and not when Kippie did not. I was starting to view my existence as such. Kippie. No Kippie . That was all the data I required.

I was beside myself whether lacking full Kippie Chiquita immersion or with her full intention.

It was my digital reality.

1= Kippie.

0= No Kippie.

Was this a healthy state of mind?

Highly unlikely.

Had I found my bliss?


I recall spending hours making out on the park bench that summer. Her curvy bottom in her yellow pants wriggling on my lap while we french kissed. Our tongues danced a Tarantella as her yellow halter top loosened enough to tease me with glimpses of  forbidden pink nipple. Taut and needy.  Our tongues dared each other to submit. Our breath mingled. Or lips pressed. Teased. Introduced. Demurred. Interlocked. Coaxed. Cajoled each other into accepting our desires.

Then feasted.

Devoured each other.

Time passed.

Functionally Disfunctional

In the morning

In the evening

She would be waiting

She would be on her knees

In a jiffy

Taking me in her mouth

Taking me with swirling tongue

Sucking lips

Slurping in between gagging reflexes

She sure knew how to suck my cock

But then her tight little cunt would call me

I know some women don’t like that word

I don’t care

She loved it

Demanded it

I obliged

I would talk about her cunt

How it felt to be in her cunt

How her cunt felt on my fingers

Her whispering cunt

Her tasty cunt

Her wet cunt

Her tight cunt

She would come on the spot

From me talking cunt

Then I would push into her cunt

With my stiff cock

Hard at the thought of her cunt

Harder than ever

Harder than Chinese Algebra

My cock splitting her cunt wide open

She would come again

And again

Fucking her between clenching orgasms

Could be challenging

Because she came a lot

Clenching orgasms

Shivering orgasms

Screaming orgasms

Oh how she came

Because her cunt was



I would come too

Und jetzt

On her knees between my legs

I’m in her mouth

Again she would suck me

Lick my balls

Her fingers would stroke

She wants me to come in her mouth



Begin the Beguine again

Can’t Stop

I can’t stop me

I filled you

Spent you

Played inside you

Smear around

Spread you

Licked you

Take a deep breath

Can’t leave you alone

I play

You resonate

You moisten

I’m encouraged


You’re flowing

Cock in hand

We play



A parting

A push

An entry

An engulfing

We fuck


ToBe or NotToBe

TMI Tuesday: May 14, 2019

TMI Tuesday is up! Get your creative juices going and tell all.

1. What is the rudest thing you have ever done?

Rude is in the eye of the beholder.

2. What do you like more being a leader or follower? Why?

Neither a leader nor a follower be.  Skip to your own lou

3. If you are single, what do you miss most about being a couple? If you are in a relationship, what do you miss most about being single?

As a single geezer I miss the sharing and the caring couples can have.

4. If you could hack into any computer whose computer would you hack?

No ones. I’m just not that curious. But once upon a time I did use a network sniffer on my home wi-fi router. I am both grateful and forever saddened by what I learned.

5. If you could shop for free at one store (brick ‘n’ mortar, not online), what store would it be?

Best Buy. That’s entertainment.

Bonus: What is the biggest favor a friend has done for you? Do you feel you must return the favor?

Biggest favor a friend has done for me was being my friend. I try to be a true friend as well when apropos.


How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Time and Venue TBD

TMI Tuesday: May 7, 2019

May is Masturbation Month. Let’s first celebrate by playing this TMI Tuesday. Second, please go celebrate by giving yourself some glorious “self pleasure” aka go masturbate!

1. Can one masturbate too much?

Anything in excess can be a bad thing. How much is too much can be handled only by you.

2. Do you masturbate daily?

Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. “The pursuit of foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.” – Emmerson

3. Do you masturbate significantly more than you have sex with another person?
A. Yes
B. No

C. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. If you are looking for a lifetime aggregate; life is too short to do the ciphering. “If you can’t be with the one you love. Love the one you’re with.” – Crosby Stills Nash & Young


4. Can you go one week without masturbating?
A. Yes

…and I have many times. But edging frequently while taking advantage of myself does make the heart grow fonder – me
B. No
C. Only if I could have sex at least every other day


5. Are you comfortable casually admitting to others that you masturbate?
A. Yes
B. Depends on Who I’m Talking To.

I have no compunction to bust that nut on every Tom, Dick, and Harriett I meet on the street. But if the conversation does reach out to that topic I will certainly take that unicorn by the horn and spew my rainbow of experience upon request.
C. No


6. Would you be comfortable performing a masturbation “show” in front of your lover?


A. Yes

Times and venue available upon request.
B. Maybe, Depends on the Personality of My Lover
C. No

7. Have you ever masturbated in a public place? Where? Why?
A. Yes
B. No

Nobody wants to see that sort of unsolicited performance when they are going about their business. But if you do…

Times and venue available upon request.


Bonus: Would you rather. . .
Never masturbate again?  OR
Have to masturbate five times a day, every day, forever?

Since I have other hobbies and interests besides philately I would say never again as long as it does not preclude me from receiving such intimate services and an occasional stamp licking. I would make time and situate myself accordingly to receive such delights.

May 28 is Wanker’s Day!

“Wank on you crazy diamonds” – Pink Floyd and me


How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!