You Want To Put What Where?

TMI Tuesday: July 30, 2019

Let’s get right to it, this week’s TMI Tuesday is posted.

 

 

1. If you were a sex worker what kind of sex work would you NOT do?

Like all human beings I have been working for sex, at sex, or because of sex since the moment I discovered my special purpose. Ergo I am a sex worker. As a sex worker I will have no doings with human traffickers. Through publishing, films, and living life I may have inadvertently crossed paths with a few; I have never transacted commerce or sex with said criminals or their victims knowingly.

2. You are a sex worker and you must have a specialty. Which ONE of the following would be your specialty and why?
a. Live sex shows

(a) It is always live. Otherwise it would be necrophilia, and unless previous arrangement was made their could be no consent: implied or otherwise. Not to mention the whole concept to me is just plain icky.
b. Professional domination
c. Camming

3. What is your secret fetish?

Massage. Giving and receiving. As vanilla as that sounds you would be surprised where such intimate rubbings lead.

4. Anal sex can be pretty alluring? Tell the truth, which do you prefer anal or vaginal sex?

As a pitcher I say nothing beats the V. Not to mention indiscreet buggery can create many an unanticipated issue. But if you are game I shall be a careful practitioner.

5. What is the most embarrassing thing you have said during sex?

Your sister never ever lets me put that there.

Bonus: Is your g-spot in your ass? If no, where is it?

If in g-spot you are referring to my goofy spot, why it is all in my head silly.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

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ToBe or NotToBe

TMI Tuesday: May 14, 2019

TMI Tuesday is up! Get your creative juices going and tell all.

1. What is the rudest thing you have ever done?

Rude is in the eye of the beholder.

2. What do you like more being a leader or follower? Why?

Neither a leader nor a follower be.  Skip to your own lou

3. If you are single, what do you miss most about being a couple? If you are in a relationship, what do you miss most about being single?

As a single geezer I miss the sharing and the caring couples can have.

4. If you could hack into any computer whose computer would you hack?

No ones. I’m just not that curious. But once upon a time I did use a network sniffer on my home wi-fi router. I am both grateful and forever saddened by what I learned.

5. If you could shop for free at one store (brick ‘n’ mortar, not online), what store would it be?

Best Buy. That’s entertainment.

Bonus: What is the biggest favor a friend has done for you? Do you feel you must return the favor?

Biggest favor a friend has done for me was being my friend. I try to be a true friend as well when apropos.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Time and Venue TBD

TMI Tuesday: May 7, 2019

May is Masturbation Month. Let’s first celebrate by playing this TMI Tuesday. Second, please go celebrate by giving yourself some glorious “self pleasure” aka go masturbate!

1. Can one masturbate too much?

Anything in excess can be a bad thing. How much is too much can be handled only by you.

2. Do you masturbate daily?

Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. “The pursuit of foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.” – Emmerson

3. Do you masturbate significantly more than you have sex with another person?
A. Yes
B. No

C. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. If you are looking for a lifetime aggregate; life is too short to do the ciphering. “If you can’t be with the one you love. Love the one you’re with.” – Crosby Stills Nash & Young

 

4. Can you go one week without masturbating?
A. Yes

…and I have many times. But edging frequently while taking advantage of myself does make the heart grow fonder – me
B. No
C. Only if I could have sex at least every other day

 

5. Are you comfortable casually admitting to others that you masturbate?
A. Yes
B. Depends on Who I’m Talking To.

I have no compunction to bust that nut on every Tom, Dick, and Harriett I meet on the street. But if the conversation does reach out to that topic I will certainly take that unicorn by the horn and spew my rainbow of experience upon request.
C. No

 

6. Would you be comfortable performing a masturbation “show” in front of your lover?

 

A. Yes

Times and venue available upon request.
B. Maybe, Depends on the Personality of My Lover
C. No

7. Have you ever masturbated in a public place? Where? Why?
A. Yes
B. No

Nobody wants to see that sort of unsolicited performance when they are going about their business. But if you do…

Times and venue available upon request.

 

Bonus: Would you rather. . .
Never masturbate again?  OR
Have to masturbate five times a day, every day, forever?

Since I have other hobbies and interests besides philately I would say never again as long as it does not preclude me from receiving such intimate services and an occasional stamp licking. I would make time and situate myself accordingly to receive such delights.

May 28 is Wanker’s Day!

“Wank on you crazy diamonds” – Pink Floyd and me

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Stufferegette Sity

TMI Tuesday: April 30, 2019

Fun, fun, fun…TMI Tuesday is up!

1. I can flex my flexibility reflex .

2. My neighbor is out of control they tried to stuff my stuffer into their tight little stuffette .

3. If you were known as a do-it-yourselfer, what is it that you diy?

If you want something done right you have to do it it yourself. Except fuck yourself. It’s okay though because you will be fucked by many others many times and fucked real good.

4. Dear god look at the size of those tits.

5. My morning routine is the best.

Bonus: If you could watch a movie about everything that happened in your life thus far, would you enjoy that movie? How many stars would you give the movie, 1=terrible   5=best movie ever

Yes I would enjoy it because it is the best movie I ever had, ever will have, and will always be having. I give it five stars and ten buns up. But life is too short for all that ciphering, so don’t forget to carry the aught.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Hop. Skip. Jump.

TMI Tuesday: April 23, 2019

They’re here! TMI Tuesday questions.

1. What is it about a woman or man that would drive you crazy?

In a good way or a bad way? Either way it’s not much of a drive. More of a hop, skip, and a jump.

2. If your employer offered an “afternoon delight break” where you leave work for an hour to go have sex, would you take that break?

Indeed. I think I would take two hours just to push the envelope.

3. On your afternoon delight break would you most often have sex with (pick one):
a. Yourself
b. A stranger (e.g., app hook-up, sex worker)
c. Your significant other

d. All of the above because whoever I spend the afternoon delight break with would be my significant other, even if just for that hour.

4. What is your best way of sustaining an erection?

Talk dirty to me and those two inches of solid blue granite will never crack.

5. Tell us the top two (2) sexual things you hate to do?

Figuring out the clasps on a bra and taking off pantyhose.

Bonus: What embarrasses you the most?

The way my eyes go instantly to a woman’s breasts no matter how hard I try to behave myself and be respectful. 

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Aural Sex

TMI Tuesday: April 16, 2019

Hey, how are you? I hope this TMI Tuesday finds you well.

1. Would you rather get a spanking in front of your family or do a striptease at your workplace?

I would strip at my workplace. The ones I care about already know about my lascivious proclivities so no harm, no foul. Besides once I expose myself at work I would be sacked for sexual harassment,  so it would be time for the next chapter anyway,

2. You are a sexy blue cherub .

3. Hey baby tonight bathe me. Bathe me real good.

4. Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button on your life?

A pause button so I could take a breath and plot my next move with an infinite amount of time to second guess myself.

5. Would you rather have noisy sex neighbors or nosy neighbors?

Noisy sex neighbors because I just adore aural sex.

Bonus: Would you rather mentally or physically never age? Why?

Physically never age so my present mind could stop making promises that my body can’t do.

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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the a mind would stop makingpromisesthat bove TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Semaphore Me

TMI Tuesday: April 2, 2019

Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday! TMI Tuesday again. Have fun.

The Dating Game (and boy is it ever!)

date, dating

1. Consider your current lover and your relationship as it stands. If this person were on a dating app would you swipe left or swipe right?

Swipe right. Swipe left. Swipe up. Swipe down. Swipe in. Swipe out. I find her incredibly attractive and a treasure. More so after every swipe.I swipe her every chance I get

 

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2. Have you ever done speed dating? Did you like it? Did you get a real or full date out of it?

I have had quite a few speed dates. I can send them scampering after the first words out of my mouth. But the few, the weird, the horny, the delicious that stick around have had very memorable happy endings.

 
3. If your date texts during a date, do you find it annoying? If yes, do you say something about it?

It depends at what point of the date they text. Early on I would not care. But if she is texting while we are fucking it can only be when I have mounted up doggie style so I can read the text over her shoulder. Spontaneous feedback is quality feedback.

 
4. How do you like to arrange dates–with an actual phone call or all via text messages?

Smoke signals or semaphores. 

 
5. For a first date, which do you prefer–drink date or dinner date?

These days I opt for the non-committal coffee or lunch meeting.  Since no gender has cornered the market on loons that just make sense for all concerned.

Mmmmmm. Coffeeeeeee.

Bonus: Have you ever been a cockblocker? Why did you do this?

If I have been believe me I was unawares, probably because my cock’s desire had been acquired and that was the only cock that mattered at that moment. Take care of your own damn cock jazz-hands.

jazz hands
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How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!