Spread

 

sketch-1557419151669

spread

your legs

expose

your sweet flower

offer up

sweet moistened petals

splayed

wide and wanton

ready to receive me

Share from Pixlr-1

Advertisements

Time and Venue TBD

TMI Tuesday: May 7, 2019

May is Masturbation Month. Let’s first celebrate by playing this TMI Tuesday. Second, please go celebrate by giving yourself some glorious “self pleasure” aka go masturbate!

1. Can one masturbate too much?

Anything in excess can be a bad thing. How much is too much can be handled only by you.

2. Do you masturbate daily?

Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. “The pursuit of foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds.” – Emmerson

3. Do you masturbate significantly more than you have sex with another person?
A. Yes
B. No

C. Sometimes I do. Sometimes I don’t. If you are looking for a lifetime aggregate; life is too short to do the ciphering. “If you can’t be with the one you love. Love the one you’re with.” – Crosby Stills Nash & Young

 

4. Can you go one week without masturbating?
A. Yes

…and I have many times. But edging frequently while taking advantage of myself does make the heart grow fonder – me
B. No
C. Only if I could have sex at least every other day

 

5. Are you comfortable casually admitting to others that you masturbate?
A. Yes
B. Depends on Who I’m Talking To.

I have no compunction to bust that nut on every Tom, Dick, and Harriett I meet on the street. But if the conversation does reach out to that topic I will certainly take that unicorn by the horn and spew my rainbow of experience upon request.
C. No

 

6. Would you be comfortable performing a masturbation “show” in front of your lover?

 

A. Yes

Times and venue available upon request.
B. Maybe, Depends on the Personality of My Lover
C. No

7. Have you ever masturbated in a public place? Where? Why?
A. Yes
B. No

Nobody wants to see that sort of unsolicited performance when they are going about their business. But if you do…

Times and venue available upon request.

 

Bonus: Would you rather. . .
Never masturbate again?  OR
Have to masturbate five times a day, every day, forever?

Since I have other hobbies and interests besides philately I would say never again as long as it does not preclude me from receiving such intimate services and an occasional stamp licking. I would make time and situate myself accordingly to receive such delights.

May 28 is Wanker’s Day!

“Wank on you crazy diamonds” – Pink Floyd and me

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Stufferegette Sity

TMI Tuesday: April 30, 2019

Fun, fun, fun…TMI Tuesday is up!

1. I can flex my flexibility reflex .

2. My neighbor is out of control they tried to stuff my stuffer into their tight little stuffette .

3. If you were known as a do-it-yourselfer, what is it that you diy?

If you want something done right you have to do it it yourself. Except fuck yourself. It’s okay though because you will be fucked by many others many times and fucked real good.

4. Dear god look at the size of those tits.

5. My morning routine is the best.

Bonus: If you could watch a movie about everything that happened in your life thus far, would you enjoy that movie? How many stars would you give the movie, 1=terrible   5=best movie ever

Yes I would enjoy it because it is the best movie I ever had, ever will have, and will always be having. I give it five stars and ten buns up. But life is too short for all that ciphering, so don’t forget to carry the aught.

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

Hop. Skip. Jump.

TMI Tuesday: April 23, 2019

They’re here! TMI Tuesday questions.

1. What is it about a woman or man that would drive you crazy?

In a good way or a bad way? Either way it’s not much of a drive. More of a hop, skip, and a jump.

2. If your employer offered an “afternoon delight break” where you leave work for an hour to go have sex, would you take that break?

Indeed. I think I would take two hours just to push the envelope.

3. On your afternoon delight break would you most often have sex with (pick one):
a. Yourself
b. A stranger (e.g., app hook-up, sex worker)
c. Your significant other

d. All of the above because whoever I spend the afternoon delight break with would be my significant other, even if just for that hour.

4. What is your best way of sustaining an erection?

Talk dirty to me and those two inches of solid blue granite will never crack.

5. Tell us the top two (2) sexual things you hate to do?

Figuring out the clasps on a bra and taking off pantyhose.

Bonus: What embarrasses you the most?

The way my eyes go instantly to a woman’s breasts no matter how hard I try to behave myself and be respectful. 

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the above TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

The Easter Bunnies Cumming

sketch-1555765313282

It was a different time. It was a younger time. It was a cumming of age time. One might say cumming was on mine and Rene’s mind all the time. Sensitivities were different. Knowledge of many things were different and learned slowly, intimately, often with great effort and reticence often brought about by the shyness of youth and reservations of opening up to the ignorance we wallowed in.

 

The major characters in this moment of time were myself, Rene, a lovely though politically insensitive black and white rabbit fur jacket, and a big plush pink bunny suit. All hopped down memories bunny trail to fatefully meet smack dab in the middle of the cosmic basket of my life.

 

Rene loved that fur jacket. Her long straight blond hair framed her delicate features and came to rest pleasingly upon her accented fur covered shoulders. It soon became a favorite amorous prop of hers.  The jacket would end perfectly above her heart shaped derriere. Her slim waist and sometime incongruously bare midriff despite the weather’s necessitating a fur jacket were beside the point. Once we were snuggled in our bunny hutch she hopped about in tiny lace panties and furry bunny jacket. This tableau often had me bursting early and often. My own personal fears, though Rene would fulsomely claim otherwise, was way too early way too often. But that chapter of irrational youthful exuberance was drawing to a close as spring time approached.

 

Still memories lingered back to the Christmas morning when I gifted dear Rene with that bunny jacket. She actually squealed with delight at un-boxing this furry delight. She hugged it tight to her firm young bosom until her wintry robe fell to the floor and the jacket took over her short teddy nightie.

 

She found a full length mirror and preened to her heart’s content while I enjoyed the view with rising anticipatory erectus. Her long legs exaggerated by the hefty furry enrapture was an optical illusion to my roiling limbic system’s delight.

 

Soon her legs enwrapped me as I licked her quivering bunny snatch while my eyes peer over her blond fringed bunnies mound as she hugged my primitive gift of animal fur close her her pitter pattering heart. I could feel her heart thrumming through my tongue as It glided hippity hoppity through her flowery flowing furrows. But when I pierced her molten snatch I burst forth almost immediately in my heated lustful excitement.

 

Far from appearing disappointed, she covered me in sweet kisses and affections until it was time for us to make our holiday rounds.

 

As I drove to her parents house for our big Christmas dinner Rene was unusually snuggly next to me crowding my end of the long front bench seat of my big ol Bonneville. She felt warm and soft next to me as the big V-8 engines heat exchange kept the car interior toasty. Good thing because she worked my stick out of my holiday suit and played with my four on the floor intently and lovingly all over the river and through the woods.  By the time we pulled up to grandmother’s house her sweet blond head dropped to my lap and swallowed me whole forthwith.. Because of my highly charged state from her holiday drive handy work it just took a couple of bobs in her tasty mouth while I caressed her bunny fur covered back for me to cum copiously in her mouth. She swallowed me all up deftly leaving nary a drop on my holiday finery. As she reclined back resplendent in her fur she brought to mind Guinevere in her winter coach being delivered to King Arthur’s Court in the movie Camelot. She was every bit as fine as Julie Christie as she straightened her make up in her compact mirror. She smiled sweetly and asked slyly, “Ready for Mummy and Daddy?”

 

After the grilling from her family and their marked disapproval of me spending my money on such an extravagance of a fur jacket, bunny or not, we had a good meal , gift exchange, and libations. A good time was had by all.

 

Fatigued and on our way to my family’s Christmas Night light supper and gift exchange Rene was more subdued during that drive, but just as lovely. My parents being older than hers I think she felt more sexually repressed in their expectant presence as only more antiquated  generations can deliver.

 

So when we arrived at my place with bellies full and plum tuckered out from the day we fell into sweet dreams in each others arms with little more than a lick and a promise of future follies.

 

It was the next few months of cold winter snuggling that made me realize that the gift of animal pelts still cut deep in the thoroughly modern psyche of young woman of that time. Or at least it clearly hit Rene right smack dab in her libido.

 

To say the least, her interest in sex was altered. Frequency, variety in locations, positions, amazing feats of daring do, not to mention trying new things too. Was it the jacket? Was it the times? Was it her growth as a woman? I will never know. All I know is our sexual detente menu went from me cajoling, coaxing, and sometimes down right pleading; to her staking her claim as a full appetite sexually wanton being.

 

I was in heaven.

 

She would show up at my door at all times. The fur covering her usually scantily clad top with either hip hugger jeans  poised perfectly on her full womanly hips below. Sometime a peasant skirt with nothing else underneath was the temptation dujour. When weather started to warm the fur coat was only thing between the world and her sweet swelling protruding pink nippled breasts. Of what joy it was to unwrap her on those occasions.

 

Or I would come home to find her curled up on the couch wearing only brief black panties, fur jacket open enough to tease the swell and curve of her champagne glass sized boobs. We would spend hours petting, fondling, fingering, kissing, and  licking each other. Sadly even with all this action, the excitement of my newly unbridled nymph, when I entered her what little control I had once had was gone and I would cum buckets full of rich creamy jizz deep inside my beloved. She was always discreet about her orgasms, but now they were shivers at best from my penetrating efforts. Still she seemed satisfied from our oral and sleight of hand communions.

 

Of course the more I tried to not cum  it seemed the briefer our copulation encores became. Still every chance she would service me anywhere with her sweet rose bud mouth and I would slather adoration between her sweet gapped thighs at every opportunity.

 

Winter turned to spring. I was out killing time at second hand shops working on my fashion sense and searching for items that would fuel Rene’s new found delight in playing dress up fuck fuck games.

 

There it was.

 

A big pink faux fur bunny suit. Resplendent with floppy ears. Buck teeth. A fluffy white tail and a very thoughtful back trap door and discreet front button fly. I knew what I had to do. Being ever cautious about garments from second hand shops my first stop was a dry cleaner. After all the inner tag of the Bugs suit said dry clean only and the little woman behind the counter did not bat an eye when I presented her with her task at hand. Clearly she had stranger ducks on her counter than this pink bunny suit. It would be ready the Thursday before Easter. Perfect.

 

Thursday after work I made the bunny stop at the dry cleaners and went straight home. Rene was coming over per our plans, but I was not sure exactly when. All I had to do was strip down , shower, bunny up and wait. I was in my favorite chair waiting when I heard her key in the door. When she opened the door she looked like she had just stepped out of the iconic scene from “Pretty Woman” Knee high heeled black boots, booty short black mini skirt, topped off with her black and white rabbit fur jacket. For some reason she had also curled her hair into big hair territory. This was not your mama’s Rene from down the block. She was a full tilt fantasy. I could see her pause for a moment. At first she seemed unsure about being presented with a big pink bunny sitting where she expected to see me. I was not about to wait around for introductions. I stood and my stiff steely cock popped right out of the open button fly of bunny-land. With a glance she recognized me.

 

“Well hello Easter Bunny.”

 

As I made my approach her hand instinctively reached for the matter bobbing between us. I deftly sidestepped and smoothed her bunny fur cover shoulders and led her to our table. My hands slid between her open jacket front and smoothed her sides with just a glancing caress of her breasts as I took her by her hips and bent her over the table. A brief journey up her mini skirt found her panties which I pulled down too her ankles in one fell swoop. I pried the filly pantie from one booted ankle but purposely left it loitering around her other ankle for aesthetic effect. With her skirt up over her perfect heart shaped behind I ran my hands over the soft luscious bunny fur on her back as I entering her deep with nary a how do ya do. She was molten, viscous, and very ready. My hands moved under her coat know and found her delicious erect nipples while I cupped her perfectly formed tits in my greedy bunny gloved hand. I think the glove fabric rubbing her tender tits made her gasps and I felt an initial pleasure spasm around my still fully immersed cock. Her snatch was needy and clutching as I pulled out. Next thrust gave way gradually as if her cunt was trying to feel every slick throbbing measure of my intrusion deep down into her sweet swale swatch of heaven. Her distended clitoris caressed my balls each time I paused my plunge deep inside and stirred her steamy rabbit hole. Being inside Rene was glorious and I would dawdle deep with in her, stirring my prick inside as to whip her into a frothy frenzy. At first I felt her fingers playing with her clit from below. Then as I stirred the pot some more I felt them cradle my balls as they worked with her furrows. So focused was I on her moans and quivering machinations below I had lost all track of the fine furious fucking we were doing. I was in the moment. I was in Rene and all other matters dissipated. Then she came like never before. Soaking me, the table and the bunny suit. Never had she made such a ruckus while we humped.

 

I still had yet to say a word, but I know my moans were in harmony with hers. She took me by my still hard and unspent cock and led me to the bed. She fell on her back, the coat was open her blouse was unbuttoned, by which I mean all the buttons were now gone in my frenzied frolic, revealing to my eyes those perfect breasts and nipples to be fondled. This time with visual guidance more precision was achieved. She wailed as her feet found my shoulders with the white pantie flying from one leg as a sign of complete surrender.  I stumbled in deep from above. She came again leaving her eyes glassy. She began talking incoherent bunny filth about filling her basket, tweaking her pink jelly beans harder, make my peeps go squish, and ram that big white chocolate bunny into me all the way to its big clumsy feet.

 

“Oh thank you Easter Bunny!” she moaned to which we parroted our favorite Cadbury eggs commercial with a hearty ”Buck Buck.”

 

Laughing we came again. We collapsed on the bed. She ripped my bunny head off and covered me in deep passionate kisses for the rest of that weekend. When we weren’t fucking like rabbits of course.  

 

Why hiding under a big pink bunny suit would help me out of my premature dilemma is another one of life’s many mysteries. Thank you Easter Bunny indeed.

 

First drafts may not be the best drafts but they sure are fun. P.S.

Aural Sex

TMI Tuesday: April 16, 2019

Hey, how are you? I hope this TMI Tuesday finds you well.

1. Would you rather get a spanking in front of your family or do a striptease at your workplace?

I would strip at my workplace. The ones I care about already know about my lascivious proclivities so no harm, no foul. Besides once I expose myself at work I would be sacked for sexual harassment,  so it would be time for the next chapter anyway,

2. You are a sexy blue cherub .

3. Hey baby tonight bathe me. Bathe me real good.

4. Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button on your life?

A pause button so I could take a breath and plot my next move with an infinite amount of time to second guess myself.

5. Would you rather have noisy sex neighbors or nosy neighbors?

Noisy sex neighbors because I just adore aural sex.

Bonus: Would you rather mentally or physically never age? Why?

Physically never age so my present mind could stop making promises that my body can’t do.

————-

How to play TMI Tuesday: Copy the a mind would stop makingpromisesthat bove TMI Tuesday questions to your webspace (i.e., a blog). Answer the questions there, then leave a comment below, on this blog post, so we’ll all know where to read your responses. Please don’t forget to link to tmituesdayblog from your website!

Happy TMI Tuesday!

4. Debbie Do

4 Into The Breach

 

I was distracted all day at work. Not to mention prone to spontaneous hard ons throughout the day. I was feeling sixteen again. The promise of getting together with Debbie that evening had me wild with anticipation. I was finally going to be able to embrace that fully packed little body of hers and sample all of those delights. My mind was racing as the day dragged on. I had a quick lunch with a client whom I think was hoping for a long liquid lunch on the expense account. But I was not going to miss out on Debbie’s delights because of a misguided liquid sales effort. Even us ad whores have to look out for our own interests from time to time.

 

I got back after lunch to messages. Good thing I showed restraint because clients were headed over with more changes. The absent Executive Creative Director had a few things she wanted us to try. Oh well. More billable time was good. I just hoped we could get through it by a decent hour. The other plus was it would make the afternoon go quicker, rather than me sitting around with a hard on thinking of the evening with Debbie Do.

 

We finished up at seven so the minute the clients were out of the room I tried Debbie’s office line. It went to her voice mail so I immediately called her home number. When Debbie picked up she said, “I was hoping you would call. Are you done there?”

 

“Yes I am. I was wondering if you were up for some company”

 

“Company?” she queried. “Well, you called at just the right time. I have something I want to show you,” she said demurely.

 

“I’ll be there in a half hour.” I said

 

“Good,” Debbie said and hung up the phone.

 

I was glad she had something to show me, because I had a few things I knew I wanted to see. I finished up and was at Debbie’s door in twenty eight minutes exactly.

 

When she opened the door I saw a large candle lit room and caught the smell of incense burning. She was wearing a flowing black diaphanous garment. Even in the dim light it showed off her compact and curvy body in delightful detail. She walked away giving me the see through view of her small but extremely mobile derriere.

 

“Come on in and lock the door behind you,” she said over her shoulder, checking to see where my eyes were fixed. I closed the door and fumbled with the locks hurriedly. When I turned she was in the center of the room. The room was nicely appointed and decorated in an eclectic style. There were many tapestries on the walls and the windows were heavily curtained. It was furnished with a large modern sectional with expansive flat surfaces and pillows of many sizes and shapes. Also two large chairs obviously designed for comfort as well as functionality. In my mind I was thinking of the possibilities, which I suspect Debbie had also taken into account with the furniture choices. This was an entertainment room.

 

She spun around so I could watch the garment flow about her body and was impressed to see her large breasts held up firmly without the aid of any support. I was never good with cup and chest size estimates, but they had to be at least 38DD. On her small five foot two inch frame they were a sight to behold. As she faced me I drank in how the fabric clung nicely over the tops of her breasts and plunged down to final closure just above her belly button. I could see the outline of her large brown aureoles through the sheer black gown. I must have gotten lost in admiring her because she snapped me back to the moment by saying, “Are you just going to stand there gaping at me all night.”

 

“I was just taking in the view”, I said audibly catching my breath. I approached her DD4slowly while she posed patiently in the middle of the room. My hand found her cheek gently and caressed down to her neck and slid to the back along her hairline. Because of the height difference she leaned her head back while I bent down to savor our first tentative kiss. Debbie had full pouty lips and I savored their softness as our lips gently pressed. I lingered slowly on her lower lip and realized that this was the first time we kissed. I let my tongue tease those lips as I went back for a second taste, and she parted her lips ever so slightly and exhaled sharply when I pulled back. I cupped her face in both hands. As I looked down into her large brown eyes and now slightly parted lips I felt a passion rise in me that I haven’t felt since my first exploratory teenage kisses long ago. Her lips parted into a smile and I pulled her body close savoring her ample charms as our tongues met and roved freely in each others mouths. I ran my hands over the sides of her glorious tits and found her waist while Debbie’s tongue fully entered my mouth and we teasingly played a game of lovers tag. Feeling her breasts pressed full against me I felt my cock begin to harden as it pressed against her belly. I knew it was time to move to one of the divans. When we finally broke the kiss she placed her tiny hands on my chest and said, “We have to do something about these clothes of yours.”

 

With that she began to slowly unbutton my shirt while looking up at me. Her short cropped black hair framed her face, which was serene in the candle lit room. The flickering shadows played seductively along her jaw line and reflected playfully in her dark brown eyes. I enjoyed her hands delicately working my clothes off piece by piece. She undid my belt, pant button, and zipper and dropped to her knees as she slid them down my legs. Usually the large knob on the end of my prick tends to weigh it down but my excitement was so extreme that knob and shaft where standing parallel to the floor and brushed lightly against Debbie’s face as she was pulling my drawers down. She looked up at my cock with a hungry animal intensity I had never seen in a lady before. Her hands slid up my thighs, along either side of my balls, shaft, and she held the knob in both hands admiringly while she rose from her knees. Her eyes then locked with mine and we kissed again as I stepped out of my trousers that were now on the floor. Her hands glided up my stomach and chest and her fingers laced behind my neck. My hardened member was pushed up between us and the tip was pressing ever so lightly against the bottoms of her massive breasts which were squashed against me.

I maneuvered her back as in a dance towards the sectional with a twirl and flourish as I raised the flowing black gown she was wearing and placed her ass on the edge of expansive white cushions. Gently I placed my hand on her breast and pushed her back on the couch. My hands slid down her slender waist and with a quick squeeze of her delicately proportioned rump ran my hands up along back of thighs, knees, calves, till I grasped each delicate ankle. With that I spread her legs wide allowing me to gaze down upon my prize. Her full breasts still sheathed in filmy black fabric that now bunched around her tummy giving me a full gander of the neatly trimmed black landing strip that pointed to the pinkest, tiniest, and wettest beaver I had yet to spy. Her aroma filled my nostrils and senses. Like a bird of prey I swooped down on her snatch as I fell to my knees before her and buried my tongue deep into Debbie’s moist crevice.

 

I was blinded with desire for her. There was no skill or strategy to this head I was giving her. I was lapping her pussy frantically like a wild beast, devouring her lips, clitoris, and trying impossible extensions of my tongue plunging in a circular motion inside Debbie’s tight flowing snatch. Perhaps the lack of finesse was made up for with my abandon because she was responding famously with heavy sighs and groans and twisting hips as she grabbed the back of my head so firmly that I thought she was trying to pull my entire head into her.  As I worked and gnawed and licked both inside and outside of Debbie’s crotch I felt the tensing and flinching that resulted in her nearly snapping my head off with her strong thighs as her orgasm flowed richly into my mouth while she groaned long and loud to the heavens “I’m Cuuuummminnng!”

 

Debbie released my head from her grip and sprawled back on the cushions, one of her glorious breasts had popped out of the now totally disheveled black gown. Her olive skin was coated with a light sheen of perspiration that contrasted nicely with the white furniture on which she was trembling while catching her breath. I rose up on my knees which put my throbbing cock in perfect position to slip into my gasping Debbie. But instead I placed it on top of the sweet black landing strip and gently began to finger her sopping cunt. Her initial reaction was as to an electric shock, yet beneath slit glassy eyes her mouth gurgled, “Are you going to fuck me with that or what?”

 

“Not yet,” I said with a grin. Or was it a smirk?

 

Debbie groaned loudly as my fingers danced along her inner thighs.